So plans change. I have learned to live with that over the course of the past few years. I have learned that when people promise something or say they can do something- yeah, it is not guaranteed to happen. Most of all, I have learned that you cannot. trust. anyone.
yes, humans fail you. they fail you all the time and if you are not careful you will be hurt.
It just seems like at some point in my life something has to start getting better right? I know that God has a plan and so many people like to keep reminding me of this as well as the fact that in His time it will happen. The thing is that I am tired. I feel like everywhere I turn I get punched in the face and pushed over. I feel like everytime I have something figured out, something is bound to ruin it. I look at some people around me and do not get me wrong, I know that we all have our baggage and for many people, things always seem to be great on the outside because as humans we are too proud to admit when we are struggling with something. As Christians we are supposed to be perfect.... or are we?
I am not dumb and I do realize that those around me have their own set of struggles. But I also wonder if they realize how lucky they are. I feel like I have been dealt my own hand of bad cards for my life. I know others who are also in the "my life is certainly not where I want it to be" category. But what about those that are in that category and are able to live out their dreams? What about the ones who are happily married with children, no debt and are able to stay home to raise their kids? Well this is certainly not me. I just wonder if people realize how lucky they are. In a moment it can be taken away.
I just hope and pray that I finally someday before I die get my break. I hope I am able to live out my life. Being that I am almost 30 and in the position I am in, I doubt it but I can hope can't I?
Renee
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